Hi John – response to your questions

December 23, 2008 adradavy

Great questions!

1. For the child who does not want to go to school, there is almost always some reason. It could be as little as not liking recess to as big as feeling like a failure. First I would try talking to your child while you are also doing something else, like playing a game, coloring, throwing a football. Kids are more likely to talk when they are distracted with something else. Just ask general questions about school – what they like and don’t like about it. I’m sure you will find some clue as to what the child is afraid of. Then I would make an appointment to speak to the teacher about it. Every teacher I have met wants kids to like school. You and your child’s teacher should be able to come up with a plan to make school a more pleasant experience for your child.

2. As for making homework livable, I would suggest putting the responsibility back on your child by setting aside a regular homework time. Say from 3:30-4:30 every day. Make sure your child has everything they need – paper, pencils, dictionary, snack, etc. Make sure it is quiet and well lit. Let your child know you are available should he have questions, but he is expected to work on his homework until it is complete. Then, don’t hover. Let your child do what they can and ask you for help if he/she needs it.

If the problem is that your child cannot complete the homework independently, then I suggest another conference with the teacher. If the homework is too hard or lengthy, then the schoolwork is probably too difficult as well and that will need to be addressed. Possibly the school will be able to provide extra help or suggest strategies to help your child.

Thanks for the great questions!

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